Two weeks ago I asked you a question: What is your Life Vision? I hope you had enough time to think how you would like your life to be because today we will bring this one step further. Today we talk about what kind of person you need to become to make that Vision a reality and I will share with you some concepts from neuro-linguistic programming, the connection between how we think and how we speak.
Only if you take ownership for your life, you can take control of your life
If you believe that life happens to you and there is nothing you can do to improve your condition, you will never be a Leader of your life! You will always be a Manager of your circumstances.
So, who do you need to be to achieve your Vision? Once you have clarity on your Vision and you know how you want your family, bank account, job, relationships, to look like, when you clarify on how you want your life to be in terms of health, energy, etc. you can work on who you need to be to make those Visions a reality!
Your life is never about what you need to do. It is always about who you need to be/become.
In some aspects you are already the person you need to be to fulfil the vision, in some instances you need to become a greater version of yourself.
Let’s do some visualization
Close your eyes and imagine there is you in 10 years from today standing in front of you. What do they look like? What do they do? How do they talk to themselves? What do people think about them? What is their body language? How do they think about the world? How happy do they seem? What’s the secret to their success? Think about all the details of this perfect version of you as if you could just reach and grab them. Now, talk to this person. If they were to send you a message, a message from the future, of how they created this life, the life you want, what would the message be? What is the main insight they give you?
Now look behind you and see the old version of yourself. You 5 years ago. Notice the difference between the past you and the future you.
Realize a crucial thing: the only reason you will not achieve the future you is because you do not let go of the past you! The greatest force that blocks human beings is the need to stay consistent how we define ourselves, with our identity.
In order to step into the new Version of you, you need to kill the identity of who you were and step into a new identity! It’s one of the greatest challenges of life. It’s an ego problem, because your brain is used to see you in a way and it will cause nervousness and butterflies when you think about the change.
Identity is one of the most important things we discuss in Coaching and neuro-linguistic programming; you see yourself in a certain way but in in order to achieve a new Vision you need to become a higher version of yourself, but how can you become someone else if you keep staying grounded and connected to the old, shitty version of yourself? It’s impossible, right? It needs a lot of work and courage.
Some people will rather stay in a terrible and miserable spot rather than jumping into the next version of themselves.Turn your back to the past you and only focus on the future you.
Never underestimate the power of what you can do in 1 year. 365 days! We usually underestimate what we can do in ten years and we overestimate what we can do in one year. But one year is still a long time! What if you woke up every single day and, rather than going with the flow, you woke up with INTENTION?
It is the same as two people driving a car and one of them goes to a place they have never been before without using GPS. They will surely get lost. Think about this: WHY DON’T YOU DO IT? Why do you stay in a negative situation rather than moving towards a better outcome? Because it’s comfortable to stay where you are? There is always a narrative inside your head, if you do not change the narrative, if you do not plug the exact coordinates into the GPS, you will not get to where you want to go.
Learn to use the right language
Your spoken/unspoken words are powerful! Never say “I am LAZY”. I am … In this blank, never disrespect yourself. Never say I am … unless the word in the blank is something empowering.
If you say “I am fat” you are telling yourself a story, and you will never go to the gym because your subconscious tells you it is a waste of time because you are fat. You have heard me saying this before: your thoughts and your words literally shape your reality and your future.
Therefore, put a fucking “I am powerful” in your head so that when you go to the gym you remind yourself that injuries are part of the past but are not the future!
I am Matteo! This is true. I am lazy, I am depressed, etc. those are bullshit things we tell ourselves. If you had health issues, you cannot state “I am sick”. You used to be sick! You are healthy now!
You are not an alcoholic. You WERE an alcoholic! You are not poor. You USED TO BE poor!
Be careful about how you talk to yourself and you will notice how others speak to themselves. “I am not applying to this job because I am not smart enough”. What? You might have an aptitude for numbers rather than poetry, but this does not mean you are not smart. When you say “I am not smart” you prevent yourself from learning anything beautiful you could learn in your life.
Here are some questions you could use to gain clarity on the empowered version of yourself
Who is this future you? What do they do?
How does the perfect version of yourself operate in the world?
Who do they hangout with? Who do they surround themselves with? This is very important because you are the average of the 5 people closest to you.
How do they talk to the people around them?
What are their thoughts?
What time do they wake up?
What type of food do they eat? Do they exercise?
How are they different than yourself today?
And this leads me to another point. When I work on Self Mastery with people one of the most recurring things is CONFIDENCE! People state “I am not a very confident person”.
What is confidence?
People who are confident follow through with whatever they say they will do, and do the right thing even if it is not the easy thing to do. If you tell someone “I will be there at 4pm” and you arrive at 4:03, you are showing that person and yourself that you are incapable of making a commitment! Forget what the other person will think about you, there is one person who is always watching you: yourself.
If the alarm rings and you keep sleeping, you tell your subconscious that you are not showing up for yourself. You know you should make your bed; if you don’t do it, you are telling yourself you cannot make a commitment.
Do you have integrity when no one else is watching? If you don’t, you will not have confidence! This is why some “famous” people are insecure, they talk a big game however they know deep down they are full of shit because it is very difficult to be consistent when no one is watching.
You giving up on your goals is you giving up on yourself
With every little action, you raise your confidence level. Confidence is EARNED, not given! It is not something you were born with, it is something you work hard on.
What would your confidence be if you showed up every single day with integrity? I can ensure you would be a completely different person, you would be so proud of yourself.
To be that person in 10 years, who do you need to be over the next year?
How do you need to show up to start becoming that person? Act as if. Put that person clothes on every day. This is why one of the additional services I offer with the coaching program is a session with a tailor; I realized that the way we dress says so much about the kind of person we want to become.
If you want to be an actor, be an actor every day. When I was in high-school I watched a video of an Indian actor, Varun Pruthi, where he said something enlightening: “Define yourself, otherwise someone else will define you and you might not like how they are defining you.”
Is what you do every day (your habits) getting you closer or further to you goals? Many people are scared by their light and, consciously or unconsciously, they do everything except what they must do to hit the goal. If you want pizza, ask yourself: would the most fit version of myself eat pizza? If the answer is no, do not buy pizza every night. It’s simple, but difficult to do.
Success is not that hard. You “just” need to have a clear vision and then show up every day, every minute, like the best version of yourself would do.
Be careful because the old you will always try to pull you back. This is why it is important to spot it and be intentional. If you go back a few steps, take some energies and start moving forward again towards the future you.
That’s what I have got for today’s article; if you found value, please share it with someone you know and love! The only way we grow and impact more people is if you guys share it so I greatly greatly appreciate all of you who will do it.
Make your life a masterpiece, see you next week, I appreciate you and I hope you have an amazing day.
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